April 3, 2009

(As if we needed more shoulds!!)

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…

enough money within her control to move out,
rent a place of her own,
even if she never wants to or needs to… –> check

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
something perfect to wear whether the employer,
or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour… –> NO, I don’t have anything like this. Damn it…will have to work on this soon.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
a past juicy enough that she’s looking forward to
re-telling it in her old age…. –> Hell yeah! My life could be a Mexican Telenovela

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
one friend who always makes her laugh…and one who lets her cry… –> I have several who make me laugh, but I think only Ruy lets me cry, does that count?

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …
eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems,
and a recipe for a meal,
that will make her guests feel honored… –> Nope! The last time I had people over I had to ask them to bring their own plate…wahahaha. This is sad

A WOMEN SHOULD HAVE…
a feeling of control over her destiny…. –> Yup I do.

…and

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
how to fall in love without losing herself… –> Never had problems with this.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
how to quit a job, –> I’ve done this
break up with a lover, –> I suck at this
and confront a friend without;
ruining the friendship… –> Yes, I’ve done this many many times.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
when to try harder…and WHEN TO WALK AWAY…  –> I think this is still unclear for me.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
that she can’t change the length of her calves,
the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents.. –> Oh my Lord. I’ve known about the hips thing since I was 8, the calves thing since I was 16…the parents thing? Since birth! Doesn’t mean I’ve given up hope though. =)

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
that her childhood may not have been perfect…but its over… –> Yes, yes, yes.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
what she would and wouldn’t do for love or more… –> I once thought I knew what I wouldn’t do for love. Now that I have Andrea…everything is being questioned again.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
how to live alone…even if she doesn’t like it… –> I’ve always known how to do this.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW..
whom she can trust, whom she can’t, –> I’m a horrible judge of character. I trust practically everyone.
and why she shouldn’t take it personally…  –> I know this in theory.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
where to go..
be it to her best friend’s kitchen table…
or a charming inn in the woods…
when her soul needs soothing… –> I know, it would be in my grandmother’s house…or anywhere with Ruy.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. .
what she can and can’t accomplish in a day…
a month…and a year… –> I honestly don’t

My bestfriend tried to pull one on me last Tuesday. I received a text from her at around 8pm.

BF: I think I’m gay
Me: Yeah right, april fool’s!
Me: Aren’t you a bit too old to be playing these tricks after all in a couple of days you’ll be turning **.
BF: I’m sooooooo HATING YOU right now!!!
Me: You f*cking started it!
BF: Well you didn’t have to rub my age on my face.
Me: Sometimes I love how annoying I can be. How can anyone be as annoying as me?
BF: I don’t think that’s possible.

In high school, I had this reputation as this person who can’t be teased. If anyone were to try, I would just throw it back at them and they end up being more annoyed than I am.

I think this is a skill. Do you guys know any job out there which can use this kind of skill? (no I don’t want to be a politician)

My hair has always been very easy to manage. I basically just wash it, brush it (occassionally), pull it up or leave it down. No products, no rituals, nothing. I am beginning to worry though if maybe what I’m doing is not enough? You see for the past 3 weeks I’ve been experiencing serious hair loss and I’m bothered by it.

This is not the first time I’ve had problems with falling hair. I’ve experienced this twice before, once after an extremely high fever and next after giving birth. In both cases though the hair loss can be explained and so I didn’t have to undergo any hair loss treatment. (Although I did consult dermatologists).

My old derma said that these things happen around 3 months after severe stress. Could that be the reason for my hair loss? Can I once again blame my company for my physical problems? This is an interesting idea!

Hehehe

Our summer plans are currently non-existent. Ruy and I are both so busy with work that we haven’t even thought about going anywhere. Ruy’s family has been trying to plan something though. My mother-in-law was offering to take us (Ruy and me) to Singapore with her. This offer came with free air fare and free stay at hotels. The downside, Andrea won’t be going with us so I wasn’t sold on the idea.

The plan fell through for one reason or another and now it’s my father-in-law who’s trying to come up with something. He wants to go to the beach. This one I kinda like cause I’m pretty sure Andrea would enjoy it. I hope the beach we would choose would not be so crowded…

I personally just want time to stay at home. Though it seems that even that is not possible….sigh.

While staying in a San Diego hotel I was feeling really good about myself. It was as if I was on top of the world. I was young, independent. All alone in a country thousands of miles away from my family — this might seem like a bad thing but to a teenager it’s a very good thing.

I remember approaching a man and asking him where the comfort room was. He then looked at me with the sleaziest eyes and said “Well honey it depends on what comfort you’re looking for”.

The words don’t really mean anything bad but at that moment I felt terrified. It was then when I realized that I don’t really want to be that far away from the people that matter. If that guy was a serial killer (yes people, I’m paranoid. I think we’ve established this already) it would take my family around 3 days before they could confirm that I was even missing and a lot longer to know that something happened to me.

That memory was so useless, yet somehow it altered my way of thinking. I’m being weird again I know….